May the Fourth Be With You: Bantha Burgers on Sourdough Blue Milk Buns

It's not every year that May the Fourth falls on a weekend. So when it does, you should probably round up your fellow Star Wars nerds and have a Galactic BBQ, right?  YES.  Even if it falls on the busiest Saturday of the entire year...seriously--why is the first Saturday in May so chaotic?  It's National Homebrew Day, the Kentucky Derby, ArtsFest, Kids Fishing Day...And this year, STAR WARS DAY.

There is no shortage of creative Star Wars food ideas on the interwebs, but of course, I had sourdough to use and needed to make bread.  I saw this recipe for "blue milk hamburger buns" and thought--yup, that's the one. But I hope it doesn't take too much food dye.

Wherein my fellow Star Wars nerd-friend who was hosting the party said, "oh, don't worry. I have an industrial-size food grade bottle of blue food dye. Take as much as you need." And he sent me on my way with about 2 Tablespoons of BLUE in one of those little 2-ounce plastic containers, like what you use for jello shots.  (You may be asking: "why does someone own a giant @$$ bottle of food dye?" And the answer is: I don't know. I've stopped asking questions at this point.)

Once home and baking, I started adding blue...got about halfway through what he'd given me, and said, "OK...that's about the color of the original recipe...but what do I do with the rest of this?"  ....Soooo....I just threw the rest of it in there as well. And we have VERY blue buns.

Note: since the "official" Star Wars blue milk buns were yeast only, not sourdough, I used that for inspiration only, and actually made these buns using The Pantry Mama's recipe (I SHOULD have reduced the liquid slightly to account for all the food dye, so I ended up having to add extra flour.  Learn from my mistakes.)

I really love the way the color ended up coming up. Yes, it's darker that intended, but with the blistering on the surface, it has a very deep space, galactic hue to it.  

The party went very well.  Our host had some "screen accurate cups" similar to those used in The Mandalorian filled with blue milk (for the kids) and Fuzzy Tauntaun cocktails (for the adults)...we also used them to serve the homebrew beer we'd brought.  

Other friends brought nerf kabobs, lightsaber pretzels, and blue milk milkshakes for dessert.  

We watched A New Hope on an outdoor screen after it got dark, while IG-88 and his pit droid stand guard:

I made 12 total buns; the recipe called to divvy it into 8 balls, but I wanted to make sure we had enough, so they were a little on the small side but worked well with the size of patties we made.  But the kids were a little weirded out by just HOW BLUE they were and decided to eat hot dogs and brats instead.  So we had a few left over to bring home.  I decided to make steak sliders the next night with sauteed onions, horseradish mustard, and melted pepperjack.  *chefs kiss*

A Super Nerdy Baby Shower!

My friend J is due to have a baby in November, so I hosted a baby shower for her at our house earlier this month.  J is a chemistry professor, and I'm a geologist, and we're both giant nerds, with a bunch of nerdy friends.  J is going to be having a beautiful baby girl, but since neither of us are girly-girls, I wanted to avoid the pink-plosion and keep things more fun and less gender-specific. And thus, the Super-Nerdy-Baby-Shower was born.

Mini Reese's "pies", Nerds in test tubes, "Sucrose" Candy, and a print of this book that doesn't exist but totally should, which went home with the mom-to-be.

I wanted to encompass a wide array of nerdy themes, because we are all-inclusive nerds.  It doesn't matter your particular brand of nerd--you are welcome here.  Star Wars, Trekkies, scientists, comic book hoarders, book lovers, and gamers unite!  ...but in a relatively laid-back, low-maintenance kind of way, because I'm still in the process of moving, and planning my own son's birthday party, on top of work and all that jazz.  Life is crazy, yo.  So let's have a fun gathering and play some fun games and eat some fun food that's got a nerdy spin to it.  

DECORATIONS:
I bought a large blank banner to create a high chair decoration for Lil' Man's birthday party, and saved the rest of it for this party.  After much ponderance of the periodic table of elements, I was able to spell a word that was *mostly* composed of periodic elements (alphabetic order cheat sheet if you need it).

New element #110: Gr ..."Growinapersonium"?

Then I borrowed a few labels from my office to give the house a touch of a "laboratory" feel.

In the event my boss reads this post--yes, I returned all of the labels unharmed for use on actual projects.

FOOD:
I probably had the most fun with this element.  There were so many great ideas out there, it was really hard to whittle things down. But ultimately, I went with a lot of pre-made foods, because I knew I was going to be limited on time.  Then I added fun nerdy themes to those food trays.

Cake truffles from AmyCakes in a nod to Star Trek.

Technically, it was a 5 Leia dip, but whatevs.  Also, pita chips for "KRUNCH!", DNA pasta helixes, and Element #111: Ch (cheese).

Lemon Oreo "Coins" and Super Star suckers.  Templates for the cubes here.

The "POP" station, and some "PUNCH" (ginger ale, orange juice, Orange Crush, and pomegranate juice). Free printables for comic book word bubbles here. 

Since J is of Jewish heritage, I also decided to make hamentashen cookies.  Not inherently "nerdy", but I thought it would be cool to throw some culture up in this party, too. I was a little nervous about making this recipe, since it's not my heritage, but the mom-to-be told me they turned out great, so apparently this Gentile can cook some decent cookies (with the help of a recipe provided by the mom-to-be).  (Note: recipe at the bottom of this post.)

GAMES:
I've been to a lot of baby showers in my day.  And I've played a lot of baby shower games.  Most of which were either: 
a) gross ("Guess This Melted Candy Bar in a Diaper" or "Taste this Baby Food", for example), 
b) involved way too much physical activity ("Chug this Beverage from a Baby Bottle", "Lick This Ice Cube & Yell 'My Water Broke'", "Toilet Paper Diaper Race", etc.), or 
c) were potentially insulting to the mom-to-be (i.e. the "Guess Mom's Waist Circumference" game, which seems totally inappropriate in ANY situation, let alone around an uncomfortable, hormonal woman).  

We'll have none of that, thank you very much. Rather, how about a skill that might actually *help* the mom-to-be, and that other moms at a baby shower might have some experience with?  Like...say...

THE PRICE IS RIGHT: BABY EDITION!

I'll say right now: I totally stole this idea of Pinterest.  But come on--Price Is Right has a good ol' nostalgic feel--who hasn't stayed home sick from school and yelled "ONE DOLLAR!!!" at their TV screen?  The mom-to-be and all the other attendees get to try to assign the prices to each baby-related item.  The guest who gets the most right wins a door prize, and the mom-to-be gets...A NEW CAR!!!  Okay, no.  But she does get to keep ALL of the items on the table.  So there's that!

And of course, because J is one of my friends from our old Wednesday night trivia team (TheBomb.com), a round of baby-related trivia seems appropriate.

I also appropriated baby photos from each of the guests who attended ahead of time, and put together a "guess who's who" game.

Here's a hint---this one is me.

If you're interested in throwing a similar party, I got all of my fonts from FontSpace.com (In Particular: Star Jedi, Montalban, Trek Arrowcaps, Chemistry, BPMolecules, and Super Plumber Brothers.)

Now...I promised you a recipe, didn't I?

Hamentashen Cookies 

(makes about 2 dozen)

Ingredients:

2/3 cup margarine (or light butter)

1/2 cup sugar

1 egg

2 Tbsp orange juice (no pulp)

1.25 cups white flour

1.25 cups wheat pastry flour

2 tsp baking powder

2 tsp cinnamon

jam for filling (I used raspberry jam since it was the mom-to-be's favorite, but you could do just about anything)

Directions:
Combine the butter and sugar, then add the egg & orange juice and mix well.  Mix in the baking powder & cinnamon.  Now start adding in the flour, about 1/2 cup at a time, alternating between the white and wheat. 

Refrigerate for about an hour, or up to overnight.  When ready to bake, heat the oven to 350F.  Then roll out on a well floured surface and cut into 3-4 inch circles (I used a small glass).  Place the circles on a greased or silpat-ted cookie sheet.  

Place a small dollop (about a teaspoon) of jam in the middle, and then fold into a triangle, using a "pinwheel" type pattern (think of folding a box so that the flaps keep the top shut rather than having to tape it), so that one end of the flap is on top of the previous, but the other end of the flap is tucked under the next flap.  Then pinch the corners a bit so there's a good seal.  This will help keep the cookies from opening up while baking so the filling doesn't leak out.

Bake for about 15-20 minutes, so that the cookies are nice & golden, but before the filling bubbles out.

Guest Post: Primo’s Red Beans & Fries

Time for another guest post from my cousin Primo, straight from his pad in NOLA!  Seemed perfect to post on a Monday!

~~~

It’s Monday and that means it’s red beans & rice day down here in New Orleans. In the 19th century, Monday was laundry day in the city. Without washing machines, the women of the house had to wash all of the household’s laundry painstakingly by hand, leaving little time for cooking.  So dinner had to be something that could cook without being fussed over.
Enter the red kidney bean, brought to New Orleans by those fleeing Haiti’s slave rebellion. The beans needed to soak overnight before cooking. After soaking and draining them, housewives simply set the beans on the stove with fresh water to boil until tender, and then added a delicious helping of sautéed “trinity”– the Cajun/Creole cooking base of diced onions, celery and bell peppers.  This would typically also be combined with leftover ham from Sunday’s big family dinner.
While I love red beans and rice, I wanted to mix things up a bit and put a small twist on a local staple. While Monday is ‘red beans and rice day’ down here, it’s Monday Night Football for  the rest of the country. Football and finger foods go together like, well, red beans and rice. Thus, red beans and FRIES were born.

(FeauxNote: if you’ve made up a big batch of red beans & have some leftovers, this is a great way to use them up.)
INGREDIENTS:
Frozen waffle fries (or if you have a mandoline, you can make your own)
1 can Blue Runner red beans
1 lb smoked sausage (traditionally andouille or tasso, but use what you like best)
1/2 – 1 cup of trinity (diced bell pepper, celery & onion)
Green onions for garnish
DIRECTIONS:
Preheat your oven to 400F and when at temp, throw in your French fries (waffle fries hold up best for our purposes; Alexia makes some seasoned waffle fries, and Great Value sells a generic for about $2.00).

While I have the luxury of a modern washing machine, I decided to cheat and use a can of Blue Runner creamed red beans for experimentation purposes (and because I felt lazy). (FeauxNote: I can get Blue Runner at Wal-Mart in Missouri, but if you can’t find them, you can try this Crockpot recipe.)

While the beans heat up on the stovetop, dice a link or two of your favorite sausage—andouille in my case (FeauxNote: Johnsonville makes a New Orleans style smoked sausage if you can’t find real andouille near you) and drop the sausage in a medium skillet or saucepan to begin heating up and releasing that delicious fat. Enter your “trinity”. Again, I cheated and bought a container of pre-chopped veggies.

Add as much or as little to taste. Sauté those fine ingredients together until your onions become translucent. At this point, your peppers and celery will retain their crunch for a good texture contrast. Remove from heat.
Place a good base layer of your fries on a plate (platter if serving family style). Add a layer of the trinity/sausage. Heap your creamed red beans on top (FeauxNote: I added the Blue Runner beans to the pot and mixed it all together, rather than keeping them separate & layering—still tastes awesome). Lastly, garnish with some freshly diced green onions from your window garden…

…add a dash (or 5) of hot sauce, and serve.

Oh, and watch out for aliens posing as butternut squash. (Compliments of Feaux’s Hubs.)

Since the serving size on this varies (especially if you’re sharing with a group), I won’t attempt a NutriFacts sheet, but just use your brain—stop when you’re full.

Hey….I didn’t say it would EASY.  But just TRY to have some restraint.

Have a great week, folks!

Baked Chicken & Sausage Jambalaya Egg Rolls

Hey there—remember back in the day when I made St. Patty’s Day Egg Rolls?  Well, that little venture got a lot of gears turning, so that I just started making baked egg rolls with just about anything.  There’s the Southwest Egg Rolls, and at some point I’ll finish my post about the Sushi Egg Rolls (I forgot to take a photo of the finished product before we ate them all, which means I need to make them again!).

Really, my egg roll recipes are typically born out of necessity.  Because when you buy egg roll wrappers, there’s 20 in a pack.  And as much as I love them, we really can’t eat more than 8 between the two of us in a sitting.  Which means you still have 12 wrappers laying around, mocking you—“okay Captain Kitchen Improv, now what are you going to do with US????”  And oddly enough, I’ve never just said, “well, I have some pork & cabbage…guess I’ll just make normal egg rolls with you.”  Because that’s not how I roll. And I prefer to make baked rolls, because they’re just WAY better for you, and as long as you give a nice light spritz of olive oil on the wrapper, they still get a really satisfying crunch.
As we move through this post, you’re going to notice something---between the prep photos & the final product photos, it looks as though my jambalaya stuffing has magically changed color.  It hasn’t.  But the first time I made these, I was using my Crock Pot Jambalaya recipe, and then the second time I made them with my Chef Folse recipe.  You can choose either, depending upon your preference, time allotted, etc.  Or you can even cheat & buy some Zatarain’s jambalaya mix.  You can also mix it up & use seafood instead of chicken or sausage (or even venison).  Totes up to you.
PS—this is an awesome way to use up leftovers, if you’ve made a pot of jambalaya the night before.  And these are perfect for any upcoming SuperBowl parties you might have!

INGREDIENTS: (makes 8 egg rolls)
8 egg roll wrappers (you should find these in the produce section, usually near the tofu.  My Wal-Mart stocks them near the shredded cabbage/bagged lettuce & veggies)
about 3-4 cups of jambalaya (it can be cold or hot)
water
Olive Oil mister

DIRECTIONS:
Preheat your oven to 425F.
Lay a wrapper on a clean, dry surface with a corner toward you.  Spoon about 1/3 – 1/2 cup of jambalaya onto the wrapper, not quite in the middle.

Roll the point that’s closest to you over the filling, gently squishing a bit so the filling is uniform in thickness. 
Now fold in the sides, and then roll over once toward the far point.  Now wet the far point with the water, and then finish rolling it up.

Spray a cookie sheet with olive oil, add the rolls, and then lightly spray each of the rolls with olive oil (you can use a brush to get good coverage).  This will help them to brown all over.

Bake for 10 minutes on each side (20 minutes total) so you get a good crust/seal on them. Then booyah—you’re done!

Now: dipping sauces.  They REALLY don’t need one.  But it’s an egg roll—so you sorta feel inclined to dip it.  I tried Cajun mustard, but it was a no-go: just WAY overpowered the flavor of the jambalaya.  However, you could try a remoulade with it…or ranch goes with about anything.  If you get creative & find a great sauce to go with these, please leave me a note! Enjoy!

Crawchos!!! (aka Crawfish Nachos)

This is an invention of my cousin Primo’s, that he dreamed up back in the day when we were still roommates in Lafayette.  Of course, back then, it was just an idea, a loose concept.  But since that time, Primo’s had a chance to perfect it into a pretty tasty dish.  And while I was down in Louisiana for work last week, he was cool enough to teach me his recipe.  This makes a pretty big batch, so it’s great for a party, and a great way to use up leftover crawfish tails after a boil!


Ingredients: (this has been slightly health-i-fied from the original)
32 oz block of Velveeta (2%), cubed
8 oz fat free cream cheese, cubed
14 oz can sweet corn, drained
2 tbsp jalapeno slices, diced
1 tbsp Cajun seasoning
10 oz can of Mexican Rotel, drained
4-6 oz light beer (I’ll recommend Abita Light to keep it Cajun)
1 lb crawfish tails (preferably leftover from a crawfish boil so they have some good spice)
1 tbsp dry Crab Boil seasoning
Tortilla chips
Sliced green onions or cilantro (optional—we didn’t have them, but I think it would make a nice garnish & add another pop of flavor)

Directions:
In a large skillet, heat the corn over medium-low heat & season with the Cajun seasoning.  Stir occasionally.  This is to pull some of the moisture out of the corn, to give it a crunchier texture.  After about 5 minutes, add the jalapenos & continue to stir.

P.S.  Now’s a good time to have one of these:

(My favorite time of year—Strawberry Lager season!)

And of course, what’s an episode of FeauxCajun Kitchen without some canine sous chefs?

(“Furreals Dad…just ONE piece of cream cheese.  But don’t try stickin’ that heartworm pill in there again. I’m on to your schemes.”)

In a large pot, combine Velveeta, cream cheese, rotel, crab boil seasoning, and beer over medium heat. 

Stir periodically until smooth & creamy, then add crawfish & corn mixture.

Continue to cook until crawfish are heated through, stirring frequently to make sure the bottom doesn’t scorch.

Arrange your chips on a plate and then pour the crawfish cheese sauce over the chips.

Proceed to chow down!!!

Nutrifacts (makes 12 servings):

Calories 370.2
  Total Fat 13.7 g
  Saturated Fat 6.3 g
  Polyunsaturated Fat 1.0 g
  Monounsaturated Fat 2.9 g
  Cholesterol 88.0 mg
  Sodium 1,869.9 mg
  Potassium 359.8 mg
  Total Carbohydrate 34.0 g
  Dietary Fiber 2.4 g
  Sugars 8.1 g
  Protein 26.7 g